How to overcome premature ejaculation and last longer in bed?

Premature ejaculation is one of the main issues that people have often complained about. This leads to several problems in sexual activities.

If the man and woman have no problem with how long the man lasts, it is fine. But if you have, it will eventually lead to various issues and differences. While it does not really matter how long the man takes to ejaculate, some men do have a problem.[1]

While fast and furious may be necessary in certain cases, some of them want to last longer. Well, if you tend to attract quickie behavior, it will eventually be a problem.

After ejaculation, men enter the refractory phase, where men fail to get an erection.[2] The refractory period is pretty common in men and will vary depending on the needs. Although some women say that it is not much of a problem, it does cause problems in your sex life.

What do you do in such a case? Either the orgasm or find out other ways to solve this premature ejaculation.

Before you learn how to last longer in bed, have a clear look at what are the possible reasons for ejaculation problems.

Common Ejaculation problems

Ejaculation is usually categorized into three different categories[3]

  • Premature ejaculation: This is one of the most common problems reported for bad sexual performance. As per a study by the National Health and Social Life Survey, one-third of American men have complained about ejaculating too soon. Hence, they wish to last longer in bed and improve the pleasure for their partners.
  • Retrograde ejaculation: While this is not many common many men do experience it. In such a case, the semen- instead of coming out of the penis- takes it way back into the bladder during the orgasm process. While it does not come out during orgasm, it surely does when one urinates.

Men experience retrograde ejaculation owing to several issues such as nerve damage, diabetes, and the interference of other medicines. Although it does not interfere with your feeling of orgasm, it can be problematic because it affects fertility directly. Men trying to get their partners pregnant suffer the most if they have retrograde experience.

  • Delayed ejaculation: As per studies, only a handful or 3% of men suffer from delayed ejaculation. The cause of this still remains unknown because many men fail to achieve orgasm even with a partner.

How do you get over premature ejaculation?

While there are natural ways to treat premature ejaculation, medicines have often been proven to be effective.[4] While these medicines are not scientifically approved to treat premature ejaculation, it, however, has helped doctors find a potential cure to the treatment. This is referred to as off-label use. Some of the prominent medicines that can help to overcome premature ejaculation.

  • Antidepressants:

Taking up selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors or SSRIs will eventually lead to delayed orgasm. However, they may cause other side effects such as nausea and drowsiness. But they may also be helpful for your desire to have sex.[5] So, if you want to get over one problem, you should know that there are high possibilities for you to have another one.

  • Anesthetic creams or sprays:

The sensitive penis is one of the main reasons why men ejaculate soon. Well, applying these creams and spray on top of the penis and leaving it for 30 minutes can help to make it sensitive. As a result, it won’t lose the sexual sensation even with the partner.

  • Tramadol

This pain relief medicine can help to delay your premature ejaculation problem.[6] The doctor may only prescribe this if the antidepressants interfere with other problems. This medicine may, however, cause addiction problems.

How to last longer in bed?

Now that you know what the common ejaculation issues are and what medicines can help to treat it, you might as well look for ways to last longer in bed. Some of the ways through which men can increase their lasting capacity include the following.

  • Workout

Involve yourself in kegel exercises or pubococcygeal (PC) muscle exercise.[7] You need to work out with full strength if you want the muscles of the pelvic floor to get strong. If you want to strengthen these, you might as well cut off the urine or try and control it. Practicing cutting off and allowing to flow again can help strengthen the pelvic muscles.

If you learn how to expand and contract the PC muscles, you will be able to control yourself as well. Experts suggest that kegel exercises can help you to last longer during sex. According to a 2005 study, 75% of men saw improvements in their lasting capacity by doing Kegels.

  • Switch things up

Rather than sticking to only one position, you should try and spice things up on the bed. Different configurations techniques have always proven to lead to improved sex.[8] Exploring your body using different sex positions will eventually help you reach the ending a little late. A little late doesn’t do any harm, right?

Also, you must try some unusual or tricky positions as it will contribute to lasting longer. If your brain is focused on how to balance and how tiring the work is, it will take longer to come. You may want to skip certain positions such as doggy style because it only makes you come faster. You surely don’t want that. Also, you may ask your partner what excites her the most so that you both can spice up accordingly.

  • Go for edging

Every man knows what edging is. Well, if you don’t, let us help you. Edging is the technique in which men try to take control of their ejaculation to delay it. Before the ejaculatory inevitability happens, edging will help you take complete control over it.[9]

Experts suggest that edging is mostly about knowing about oneself. While you may have a hard time doing it during your orgasm, edging is something you will want to try during masturbation. This is the time when you can focus the most on your physical as well as sexual strength.

Men have often claimed that edging has helped to delay orgasm or reach superior orgasm. Well, edging may as well be considered to be the natural way to maximize your coming capacity.

  • Slow it down

Good sex is all about taking it slow and steady. Men have often tried to be the stronger and superior one during sex.[10] Therefore, to show their superiority, they tend to go fast. And this is where the problem lies.

Slow sex will not help to light up the sensuous atmosphere but will also help you understand when you are about to reach orgasm. So, men, if you want to please your partners the most, try taking it a little slow. This is not a race, but love, so, go accordingly.

  • Distract yourself

This may sound a bit weird, but trying to distract yourself can help you come a little later. Think of whatever you can when you feel that you are about to reach orgasm. Although there’s no proof of how it can help, it is said that having non-sexual thoughts can help you ignore the sensation of coming and help you cope.

Use Pelay gel

There’s nothing wrong with being a little submissive. If you feel you have premature ejaculation problems and have a tough time lasting long on the bed, make sure to follow the suggestions mentioned above.


[1]  Schapiro B. Premature ejaculation, a review of 1130 cases. J Urol. 1943;50:374–9. [Google Scholar]

[2] https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2721550/

[3] Althof S. (2006) Prevalence, characteristics and implications of premature ejaculation/rapid ejaculation. J Urol 175: 842–848 [PubMed] [Google Scholar]

[4] https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2671940/

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[7] https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4003840/

[8] https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4553859/

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[10] Semans JH. Premature ejaculation: A new approach. South Med J. 1956;49:353–58. [PubMed] [Google Scholar]

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